When You Get The Worst News

Other families have cancer, not us.”

That’s what my daughter said when my wife, her mother, was recently diagnosed with cancer.  It is a body blow to hear that someone you love has the disease that is the second leading cause of death in America.  You would think that I’d handle the news better.  As a Pastor of many decades,  I have made countless hospital calls and prayed with hundreds of people diagnosed with cancer.  I still struggled to get my mind around it.  Maybe, all my exposure to other people’s battle with the disease made my own acceptance of it more difficult.  Ignorance sometimes really is bliss.  But, cancer is now part of my family’s journey whether we like it or not.

I have to say that our family is as prepared for this challenge as any can be.  We have all the factors for a successful treatment in our favor.  We are blessed with insurance to help with the enormous costs. We are blessed with outstanding physicians and hospitals and are receiving excellent treatment.  We are surrounded by loving family and friends to encourage us.  We are strengthened by an amazing church family that is so supportive.  Most of all, we are people of faith that live in confidence of our God’s active role and plan for our lives, including this cancer.  With all these supporting factors, we are confident of success and moving ahead as bravely as we can manage. Our struggle, compared to those faced by many others, is small.

However, this blog is not about our battle with cancer.  It’s about how to deal with the day when the worst thing you can imagine happens in your life.   All of us will face such a day.  How do you manage it when the prognosis is negative, the balance sheet is shockingly red, and the divorce papers show up in your mailbox?   How do you cope with middle of the night phone call that begins with the words, “I sorry to have to inform you?”

Here are some suggestions I give my coaching clients:

  • Start to prepare now for what you don’t know is coming.
  • Strengthen your bonds now with those who truly care for you.
  • Exercise your problem-solving muscles now with easier issues.
  • Do your best to get your finances ready now for any crisis that may come.
  • Develop your spiritual life now before the crisis appears.

My family is doing well with our cancer journey.  It’s early on in the struggle.  We’ve had a couple of minor surgeries, and we are reviewing our options as our wonderful doctors lead through this journey.   We are believing for a complete recovery and learning to love each other more every day. But, whatever comes, we know our God will get us through.  May God bless you if you are facing a daunting challenge in your life.   I know you can find the strength to not just, “survive, but thrive,” if you’ll keep your attitude positive and your faith strong.

P.S.  I have been writing a daily devotion, for another cancer sufferer that will hopefully become a book. If you are interested in signing up to receive these devotions contact me on this website.


10 thoughts on “When You Get The Worst News

  1. Sorry to hear about your wife. Patricia and I will keep your family in our prayers. Please add me to your daily devotions. J

    1. Thank you as always for your inspiring and heart felt words. Please add me to your daily devotions, would love to hear from you daily! Wishing once again we lived in Tyler!

    2. Dear Beckham family my heart goes out to you all as I remember June 29 th last year when we got our worst news! My youngest disgnosed with PancreaticCancrr and told less than 6 % of the people who get it survive!! After a long battle and many treatments God led us thru and she is now cancer free! My prayers are going up for Barbara and you all as you minister to her!My family is so much closer after this year.Trust in TRUST IN THE HEALER OF A LL HEALERS!! HE IS ABLEWe love you’ll
      And here for you Debra

  2. Thank you for always inspiring me…always lifting and praying for others. Bob and I are in prayer daily for you, Barbara and your precious family. I know God will get the glory for each step of your journey. It’s always challenging being on the other side…praying for continued Strength, Love and Wisdom that only comes from our Lord and Savior.

  3. I am so sorry to hear about the news of Barbara and your family’s battle with cancer. It becomes a time of coming together for the family. My wife has had 3 battles with cancer since 2004. The battles have become a war in a way. God has a special purpose for this and you all will overcome. I will be praying for strength, healing, and comfort for you all.

  4. Kim,

    Bless you and your family. Many prayers and wishes coming your and Barbara’s way! Thanks for sharing your journey. There’s purpose in suffering. 2 Cor. 1:4 & 12:8-10 My personal favorites.

    Don & Kathy Mingo

  5. So sorry to hear about your precious wife. The journey is real for you and dear wife. I will be praying and would love to follow and receive the devotions. Blessings and prayers.

  6. Hello Kim, please know we continue to pray for Barbara & your entire family during an incredibly difficult, yet joyous time.

    Our family has many wounds and scars from having battled cancer. Even so, we found as y’all are that the thoughts & prayers received from the myriad of friends you have will not only provide real comfort, but to energize your faith knowing an army of prayer warriors has circled the wagons on your behalf.

    Allow me to offer a prayer on your behalf. Good morning Lord. Thank you for being the loving, mighty and awesome God that you are. For having painted such a gorgeous day and allowing us the blessing to enjoy it. Lord, please create a hedge of protection around Barbara & her family. Shower her with your love, comfort and above all Your mighty healing hand. Manifest Yourself in such a way there is no doubt who reigns in this situation and that lives witnessing your handiwork will be changed because of your doing so. Lord, I thank you in advance for answered prayer. May You receive all praise, honor and glory that you so richly deserve. Amen.

  7. Bro. Beckham and Barbara,

    I’m just reading this tonight and am so sorry to hear this news. I’m sorry that I’m just finding this out. I will be praying for you both daily and will also pray for your family.

    You both mean so much to Max and I and we are thankful for your leadership, friendship and love to us.

    We’re so thankful to be part of your church family and if there is anything we can do for you, just know we are here for you.



    PS. I would like to be a part of the devotionals you are writing and sending out.

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